Choosing Therapy

Often, making the decision to start therapy is very difficult and can create anxiety. 

Do I need therapy?

Will It even help?

Should I keep it a secret?

Does it mean I’m ‘crazy?’

How is it different from talking to friends?

Will I become dependent?

How will I find the right therapist?

None of these concerns are unusual. As for the first question, it’s likely if you are thinking about therapy, you want to talk to someone and what you have tried has not been working. Getting a referral from someone who is happy with their therapist or from a medical professional can be a good option to set up an initial appointment. Setting up a first session can be helpful to determine if you and the therapist feel a connection. At the end of the session, your therapist should share what he/she feels will be helpful going forward. The decision to proceed is completely up to you.

People come to therapy for a wide variety of reasons. One need not feel or act ‘crazy’ to qualify. Often, we enter therapy with one issue only to learn that other issues take precedence or underlie the presenting complaint. My goal is to help you learn and understand more about yourself, to become more self-aware and more comfortable.

Therapy is a private endeavor but need not be a secret. Your decision to share your participation in therapy is also up to you. Your therapist is legally and ethically responsible for your confidentiality if you are over 18.

Talking about your issues to friends and family typically involves give and take, with others talking about their own problems or making suggestions about what you should do. While friends and family care about you, they may not have the space to keep the focus on you. We may not feel comfortable being completely honest. We worry about sparing others’ feelings. A professionally trained therapist is not there to disclose personal experiences and emotions. Your therapist is there to listen to you. You can share everything while being assured of privacy. I avoid telling anyone what to do. I help explore what will be the best direction for you and work through what may be difficult about making hard choices.

I emphasize that working with a therapist one hour per week never creates dependence, but gives you issues to think about for the remaining 167 hours of the week.

You should never feel stuck in therapy. While sometimes it is difficult, you should want to continue until you feel you are in a better place. Finding the right therapist is like finding a friend. While a therapist is NOT a friend, we know after meeting someone whether we feel comfortable and understood. This is how your therapist should make you feel. Please be in touch for a complimentary 15-minute conversation to see if I can help.